by Clarence P.
(California, USA, December 2005)
Before I trusted Christ
I thought I was doing well, living a worldly life, me and my wife of thirteen years with two most beautiful children. I was doing just fine raising a family of my own, "the perfect family" as I always loved to hear. My son, the oldest of my kids, lived in Texas with his mother, going to school out there. I had a long-time job working for a home-development company as a yard jockey pulling trailers and docking them as well. I also trained drivers. Then I moved on as a traffic clerk.
Every since the death of my brother I smoked marijuana to be able to cope with my life. I had problems I just couldn’t believe… I sometimes still think I'm in a dream of some sort until this day… my brother passing because of me who I miss so much. We were fighting as some brothers do, and I had a knife. I hit him in the legs… well it hit an artery and he passed away. I never ever fight no more.
Since I've trusted Christ
With my very soul, because of my past that's still here haunting me, I met Jesus Christ. He is my personal savior and close friend. My mother, sisters, brothers all have been there somewhat. I read Christian books that explained how to come to trust Christ. The Bible stories are the best stories I've ever read in my life. There's people of all walks of life in the best story ever told (the Bible) that opened up my eyes… that's how I trusted Christ, by learning of Him what he has done for us all.
Since I've trusted in Jesus, my nightmares have stopped. I'm taking medicine for my psychological mental processes and behavior. I'm diagnosed as being bipolar, and meds I take are called Pasil. I used to not take them and just smoke a lot of weed, at least a quarter pound a week. It kept me calm and cool with myself, easy to do things without getting a block on what I was doing, like Pasil but a lot better. Well Jesus I find is far more better than both, even though I'm still taking the Pasil, I think I'm ready to stop that soon. Jesus and I are working on that – maybe one day I'll be just fine thanks to Christ Jesus.